With the end of this month drawing to a close, I can
officially say it has been the most unique month of my life. As the title
suggests, I have been living in a state of perpetual
flux. A period of completely unstructured time, and even less responsibility,
has lead me to essentially have had the world in my hands. This thought is the
lighter side of my psyches recent experiences, and what I deem the cause of
some of my highest highs. But as the saying goes, “With the highest highs come
the lowest lows.” Seemingly endless time, has recurrently left me fully
isolated and submersed in my thoughts; deep thoughts inherently lead to
realization and conclusions. Not all of which I have come to have been pretty,
or exactly spot on.
In the middle of summer, a romantic relationship I cherished
more than any I have found myself in before, came to a close. Not because of
any negative feelings or wrongdoings, simply because of
geographical distance. “Man’s Search for Meaning’ by Viktor E. Frankl, is the
novel I am currently using to entertain my outlook on life. Frankl, a Jewish
psychologist authored this chronicle after a stay in, then liberation from,
Auschwitz. His main point is “He who has a why
to live can bear almost any how.”
His “whys” are work, dignity, and love. Although my thoughts for weeks were filled
with doom and gloom from rather compulsively missing the aforementioned, rewarding
experiences, Frankl’s wisdom, and getting back in touch with flying solo
carried me through my sad period and I am now feeling refreshed and as
independent as ever. :]
In this past month, I have had periodic conversations with
family members more or less about self-confidence. One of them repeatedly
mentions her wish of obtaining more. As some of you know, I am a talker, and
thoroughly enjoy sharing advice when I see the opportunity to do so
productively. This nagging, unfulfilled wish of hers got me thinking.
Self-confidence is not a stagnant concept. It is a quality that must be built,
it is something that must be continually fed to obtain. Break-ups, especially
from super fulfilling and wholly good relationships, undoubtedly lower
emotional morale and provide space for soul-crushing pity parties, trust me I
know. But the doors that open when you are done crying are massively
opportunistic. They allow you to truly discover your “why,” unconditionally
influenced by anyone else.
Another interesting complex I have transitioned to is being
the youngest in social groups I find myself in, rather than the oldest. This has given me insight on the “real world” so to speak. Being
constantly surrounded by people your own age puts being an adult on a pedestal
of sorts, it turns adulthood into this goal we are all constantly striving for
but also gravely dreading. I have come to realize that in almost every sense of
the word, I am an adult. I always thought people were constantly changing until
they became who they were. I now understand that some people developmentally
have stopped and will be forever content with stagnancy and that some people
will never stop their quest for personal growth. I hope to be one of the latter!
Now, for the lighter side of things! Throughout these past
30 days, (roughly) I have been lucky enough to do odd jobs for lots of my
parents’ friends. I have done everything from minting coins and squeezing
farm-fresh honey-aid, to landscaping. For me, waking up and getting to do
something very different than what I did the day before, every single day, has been super fun! I love meeting and working with new people. Everyone has something to offer
and there is a lot to learn through one-on-one conversations with strangers; be
it interesting facts, fun places to dine, or perspectives on living a good
life.
Through one of these fun encounters, I was able to experience
a concert like no other I have ever been to. I served chips and dip for
the MoRub tent, at Simnon Estes amphitheater in Des Moines during a Michael
Franti concert. I have heard Michael Franti many times before, I even have some
of his music saved on Spotify. Prior to seeing him live however, I often
skipped these songs when they popped up on shuffle. There is no way I will ever do
that again. Michael has catchy, feel-good tunes, but during his performance his
radiant love and beauty were so overpowering that the ambiance literally brought me to tears!!!
It was a spiritual experience that moved an entire crowd of strangers to hug
each other. To witness and be a part of it was amazing. I knew some force had
brought me to the right place at the right time when he dedicated a song to
everyone who wanted to work toward saving the rivers, lakes, and oceans! It was
a magical experience and a catalyst in ending my slump.
Life lately has been interesting to say the least, and I know
with my upcoming trip to Rhode Island and big move approaching, my state of
perpetual flux will be off the charts! But I am excited to have and share those
adventures, so keep your eyes peeled for another post soon! I have attached
links to a book discussion on the book I mentioned, “Man’s Search for Meaning,”
a link for Michael Franti’s website in case you are interested in learning
more, a link to the MoRub site because you gotta help your people out and their
products are absolutely delish, and a link to the images of Simon Estes because
it is a beautiful place!
Until Next Time :]
Michael Franti: https://www.michaelfranti.com/
MoRub: https://morub.com/
Simon Estes Ampitheater: https://www.google.com/search?q=simon+estes+amphitheater&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjo-Ouu5PrVAhUq34MKHcpCCXgQ_AUICygC&biw=1295&bih=747
P.S. If you would like to be on my list of people that receive sporadic postcards, comment or message me your name and address!!
P.S. If you would like to be on my list of people that receive sporadic postcards, comment or message me your name and address!!
